I am grieving over the loss of one of my greatest sources of inspiration, a man I have never met but whose words have touched the core of my being and injected a world of possibilities in my mind and into my life.
Scott Dinsmore, the creator of Live Your Legend, a global movement encouraging people to find and do the work we love, has passed away in an accident while trekking on Mount Kilimanjaro with his lovely wife Chelsea.
I watched this video above before they embarked on their journey. I loved their camaraderie and love for each other expressed in this candid video and I want to remember this forever...how I was amazed at their courage, and at their willingness to question people's assumptions, and at making the 'impossible' possible.
Scott shared his life with people unabashedly, openly, with all the vulnerabilities, failures, and fears. He was genuine, he shared his beliefs, and he loved and supported everyone he met (and didn't meet...through his videos). Staunch in his aim to help people find the work they love and to "give a shit about their lives instead of just listening and following", he created so many worksheets, videos, and courses that were free for anyone and everyone to use. I was one of the thousands who came across his material.
"What is the work you can't not do?"
"Taking a job just to build up a resume is like saving sex for old age. -Warren Buffett"
"The biggest risk is not that you try something. The biggest risk is that you wake up in one year, or five, and wishing you tried something but didn't."
My whole life, I was living a life that was 'expected' by family, friends, and society. I got the grades, I scored the marks, I was the 'ideal' obedient child. But I was lost after graduation in 2012. I had no idea what I wanted to do now that there were no grades to chase after. Grades had defined me my whole life. Building a resume, impressing others, having what was needed, getting a stable job, paying the bills. This is what life is about. Or so I thought...and so does a majority of people in society.
Scott broke through fixed mindsets about what was possible and what was not. He hit the nail on my head, that it is utterly worthless having a qualified degree and excellent grades without the practical skills to make a difference in the lives of others. He shared stories about single mothers pursuing their dreams, a debt-ridden man supporting a family of 8 on a blog, a family with 5 children travelling the world.
Because of Scott, I started thinking about what I enjoy doing. I never thought about this my whole life! I was doing what OTHER people could reward me for. Nothing to me was worth pursuing if it didn't lead to some kind of achievement or recognition from my parents, or my friends. I did things only if they were manageable and fairly easy to handle. I was (and still am struggling to overcome being) a perfectionist - I become discouraged in doing something interesting if I faced a setback.
Scott inspired me. I wanted to make a difference like him. I wanted to change people's mindsets and challenge their view of what is possible in a career. I thought of becoming a career coach or counsellor, or a life coach. I started watching videos by inspiring influencers like Simon Sinek, Brendon Burchard, and other TED speakers.
Scott made me realise that struggling is a part of the process of finding meaningful work. Setbacks are perfectly normal and often we don't see the struggles of successful people. We marvel at their achievements, and we expect and hope to get to where they are without the struggles.
This gave me grit and perseverance. I emailed professors around the world for PhD supervision on how authenticity fuels life decisions that enhance well-being. When that didn't work out, I applied for Masters courses in Australia and the UK on coaching. I applied for scholarships and am still waiting for the results.
Because of Scott, I looked within myself and found my strengths. All my life, I had been defining my worth based on external traits like grades. I never believed I had strengths I could use to change the lives of others. Scott said the world does not benefit from us trying our darndest to overcome our weaknesses and hating the process - instead we should leverage on our strengths and maximise their potential. Scott suggested that we take the Gallup Strengthsfinder Test and find out our strengths and how best we can use them in what we choose to do.
This was comforting and affirming, knowing that I can view myself in a new light. That I may accept what I dislike doing/am bad at doing instead of feel guilty about it, and discover my strengths: I connect with people well, I gather information well, I choose to see the potential in others, I value friendships and relationships. I started living a life based on my values and saw the decisions I made as rooted in what mattered to me.
Scott emphasised that small steps of progress mattered since we could never get to perfection right from the start. And because of that, I chose to do what I enjoy even if it doesn't seem to yield results immediately. I bake once a week and I'm learning to cope with imperfection, having baked utterly inedible cakes I had to throw away. I have a drive now to master the cakes I failed, to try again and again. I am more forgiving with myself, and I choose to because perfectionism is a hard place to be.
"We are the average of the 5 people we spend the most time with."
Scott made me realise that I had to minimize my toxic relationships and with people who only criticize without constructive feedback. I started to choose to spend time with people who inspired me and whom I could learn from, who were living authentic lives with meaning. I value these people so much, and have so much to learn from them; people who love unconditionally, people who add value to others, people who are a bundle of joy and energy, people who see the potential in others, people who encourage others, people who share their lives openly and willingly, people who are grounded in the word of God. If I could I would have loved to meet Scott and Chelsea in person. I aim to be like them.. and other amazing influencers in my circle of friends - Tricia, Josiah, Esther, Justin, Jaya, Heonjin, Aditi, Hongyuen, Kaixuan, Rachael, Kaishi, Kenneth, Chenhui, Johannes, Lin, Anh, Suman.
Because of Scott, I started blogging. I'd had my own blog since I was a teenager but it died off after a few years. Scott re-ignited my love for writing my thoughts in a public space. I choose to do so in a way that hopefully inspire others, here. I started my own food blog as well. Writing leads to clarification. I'm not sure how my blogs will make any difference to anyone but I enjoy writing and I'll just see how it goes from here. Which brings me to the next point...Scott was amazing in being comfortable in uncertainty, or at least, being honest about the discomfort but accepting it anyway.
"The fastest way to do the things you don't think can be done, is to surround yourself with people already doing them."
I joined and met incredible people in the LYL Singapore community. I find it amazing that we come from so many different backgrounds, yet are connected in our journeys in finding what matters to us. I have spoken to so many coaches, and I have spoken to people who do baking often or who do home-made meals regularly to find out how they do it.
Wow.. I'd never imagined that I could write so much about how Scott made a difference in my life when I first started writing this. I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Thank you Scott, for being my role model. Thank you for transforming my life. I hope to be like you, a light on the earth that illuminates the lives of millions. I'm keeping Chelsea and their families in prayers at this unbelievable loss... I will miss you, Scott, and your incredible energy and love.